“Strong emotional reactions are rarely about the moment in front of us, they’re about the history we carry into it.” When The Heated Rivalry premiered, I noticed something familiar happening in my therapy room (besides the intentional prompts to unpack felt experiences). Gay men weren’t just talking about the show, they were talking about themselves. Some came in animated, energized, almost surprised by how invested they felt. Others came in quieter, more guarded, sometimes

“Sometimes desire is just loneliness in better lighting.” Chasing a feeling through sex is one of the most common themes I see in my work with gay men. It shows up quietly, wrapped in humor, sexual freedom, or the ever-reliable “it’s not that deep.” But beneath the surface is usually something very human: the desire to feel something; connection, affirmation, relief, power, escape, belonging... if only for a moment. Let me be clear: sex can be beautiful, fun, sacred, messy, n

“Is it me!?” If you’ve ever caught yourself asking this while scrolling another endless feed of dating profiles, wondering if genuine connection even exists anymore, you’re not alone. Every week in session, I hear versions of the same thing: “Dating feels impossible.” “Dating is exhausting.” “Everyone seems emotionally unavailable.” There’s a growing sense that we’re living through what many call a dating pandemic or, as sociologists have described it, a dating recession . It

...the bottom line on bottom shaming is that your position never defines your worth.

There’s a certain kind of silence that settles in your chest when loneliness shows up. It’s not just about being alone, it’s the longing...

As a therapist who works with many gay men—and people of all orientations—there’s a recurring theme that often surfaces in conversations...

Let’s be real for a second: in the world of gay hookups, it’s easy to lose sight of what you actually want. Grindr, Scruff, Hinge, IG...

Let’s be real for a minute: “Who do I want?”  is not as simple a question as it sounds—especially when you’re a gay man. For a long time,...

Dating, at its core, should be about discovery. Of someone else, sure—but also of yourself. And if you’re a gay man navigating this world with your authenticity intact? That’s not just brave. That’s *love*—the kind that starts with you.